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California Drought: 10 Ways to Save Water

There is no “I” in drought. There is also no “A”.

california drought, draughtBecause I live in Parched City, California, I know you little nanny goats have been dying to ask me what I’m doing to save water. Well, it doesn’t matter what I’m doing, what matters is that everyone else is doing it. And I’m here to tell them what for and how to. Did you know we’re suffering from the biggest California Drought ever (if you don’t go back more than 1200 years?)

When it’s yellow, let it mellow

If you go number 2, flush down the poo.
If you go number 1, let it stay, just for fun…..unless you’ve had asparagus.

Put a brick in your toilet tank

If you don’t have a brick, and really, who doesn’t have a brick laying around the house for a rainy day, then take a one quart container, fill it with water, cap it, and put that in the tank. Just think, every four flushes save a gallon of water. If you’re thinking it’s hypocritical to fill something with water when that is exactly what you are trying to save, then just pee in it instead. Unless you’ve had asparagus. If pee grosses you out, then I don’t know, drool in it, but who has that kind of time?

Stop shaving in the shower

And stop visiting Rosy Palms and her five sisters in there, while you’re at it. Recent studies show that doing hand-to-gland combat in the shower wastes up to 45,000 gallons a month, so knock it off, so to speak. You too, guys. Seriously though, according to Water Use It Wisely , shortening your shower by even 2 minutes saves up to 150 gallon per month.

Scrape dishes instead of rinsing before washing

Unless the dishes in your sink have been there a month or more, in which case I would suggest you throw them and the furry animals clinging to them in the trash. And get yourself to an AA meeting already.

Don’t throw ice cubes in the sink

If you’re a klutz like me or your refrigerator is a bitter little jerkface, throwing ice cubes across the kitchen just because you haven’t changed the filter in six years, don’t put them in the sink. Pick them up, stick your tongue out at the appliance with the attitude and put them in a house plant.

Don’t use your garden hose to water your lawn

Use your neighbor’s hose. Obviously.

Make Your Own Water

Enroll in your local university, get a bachelor’s degree in chemistry and make your own water. I mean it’s two H’s and one O, how hard could it be?

Report Leaks

Contact the property owner if you find errant sprinklers and broken pipes. You’ve been cranky anyway, what with the yellow water in your toilet and short showers, so this is an excellent opportunity for you to get all self-righteous and let off some steam and take it out on someone else instead of your partner who has to live with you all the time. Even better? A leaky hydrant means a nasty call to the government – FTW!

Make Your Own Rain

Since we have “dual climate” systems in our cars, Set the driver’s side to MAX HOT and the passenger side to MAX COOL and create your own weather system. Don’t forget a bucket for the center console.

And Another Thing

Speaking of cars, if that little snowflake button on your dashboard doesn’t make snow, take it back to the dealer and don’t leave until they fix it. Call the media and start a protest if you have to.

Talk to People (Bonus Tip)

When you’re at the coffee shop, write #DraughtTogether on your cup. When people tell you that you spelled it wrong, take the opportunity to engage in a conversation. If they won’t engage, simply yell across the store just before they run out the door, “You know the coffee is made with recycled water, right?” Which may start another conversation. With someone else.

  – – –

If you can’t tell whether I’m kidding or not about saving water during this California drought, you aren’t well informed enough about water conservation and should visit Save Our Water for the reel deets, yo.

(Photo lifted from NBC News)

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  1. Kobe says:

    It takes 660 gallons of water to produce 1 hamburger. that’s 2 months of yellow toilet water, bricks in your toilet tank, shaving in your shower, and scraping dishes not rinsing.

  2. I think such these steps we can not save water. we all need to create some way to produce more water.

  3. Or… you could just come to scenic Rochester for the duration… where the skies are cloudy all day. (We’ve been letting it mellow, despite our rainy weather. Just planning ahead, you know.)

    1. The East Coast is the polar (pun intended) opposite of us dry lake bed folks.! Good for you for conserving anyway, Boom Boom!

  4. I’m drinking gin with no ice until it’s over.

    1. Margaret says:

      Yeah, that’s sounds about right, Linda!

  5. “…..Use your neighbor’s hose. Obviously.” Hahahaha– I’ve been doing that for years.

    Good reminder, Margaret. We’re looking into the drought tolerant plants and removing the grass from our front yard. It’s a lotta work, but I’m getting closer and closer to going that way. My BFF did it and her yard looks fabulous. None of that crappy looking Turf Terminators cement gravel for her– she did an awesome job with planting and mulch and WOW– Maybe I could hire her 😉

    xo jj

    1. Margaret says:

      I love the idea of going grassless. So much of California is desert land (including Sacramento) and the only grass we should have is the kind you smoke. (sorry, easy lame joke).

  6. I’m down with all of these, Margaret. Been doing the “mellow yellow” thing, but didn’t know about the brick. I remember a pretty bad drought back in the 70s, I think. Supposed to get some rain on Tuesday. Putting buckets out to catch some for dry day plant watering.

    The big question is can coffee be made with vodka?

    1. Margaret says:

      I’ll bet coffee could be made with vodka. Try it and let me know! I remember a that big drought many years ago too. But I don’t remember what we did. Yes, this set of storms is supposed to bring much needed snow to the Sierras, let’s hope it’s a big dump!

  7. When I first came to my farm it was in drought but it is not any longer. I would advise you to not poop in your water bucket. I do this sometimes just to annoy the publicist. I flick one goat berry in there just to see her curse. I laugh my goat laugh and walk away.

    1. Margaret says:

      OK, no pooping in the water bucket. Check. Thanks, Pricilla!

  8. Anji says:

    … and I thought you lived in New York.

    Sharing a shower is a pleasant way to save water

    1. Margaret says:

      Really? Maybe it’s because sometimes I go on and on about how much I love NY!!! In fact, I’m overdue for a visit. I’m getting the DTs for Broadway. Also? I love your idea about shower sharing.