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Bathrooms That Freak People Out

So last night, we took my Dad to dinner for Father’s Day at Logan’s Roadhouse, which is one of those places with peanut shells all over the floor, very-American music (a new genre I just coined that consists of three sub-genres: country, western, and Bruce Springsteen) and yeast rolls that act like heroin in your [...]

What’s The Worst Thing You’ve Done To a Customer?

Oh sure, I can admit it now, but I can’t look back on it with fondness because for all I know, I killed a person. Or two. In 1982, I donned a brown polyester can’t-get-all-the-grease-smell-out uniform a few times a week to work at Kentucky Fried Rats Chicken right here in Sacramento.  So the good [...]

Do You Call It Soda or Pop?

Do you say “soda” or do you say “pop”? Or are you from Texas?

I’m a Princess Among Thieves

I’ve never participated in a White Elephant gift exchange before. And I thought they’d disappeared along with the 1970s which is more or less the last time I’d heard a reference to them. So they’re either back in vogue, or they never left and I fell asleep for about 30 years. I went to a [...]

Maybe I Just Have a Hole in My Lip

Have you ever had the feeling that any minute now, love will find a way? That the answer is just blowing in the wind? That bananas will remain yellow for more than 28 hours in the fruit bowl on the kitchen counter after you’ve brought them home from the grocery store? Yeah, me neither. You [...]

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