Or, Guess How Many Pills Are in This Bag
You’re probably wondering what the hell was the matter with me to have what, at a distance, appears to be a bag of Skittles.
And the fact that it does look like a bag of sugary candy is why this is a horribly dangerous thing to have sitting out on the counter while hosting a children’s birthday party. Not that I did anything like that just to see what would happen, especially if that snot-nosed Milo bastard, the one who always farts on everyone and pinches the cats, got a hold of them.
Instead, I brought it to my NA meeting to see what would happen.
Well, I had to get rid of them somewhere, and who else but a bunch of burned-out, but imaginative, druggies could figure out the proper way to dispose of unused prescription drugs, am I right? It was that, or drop it off at some random rave at 2 in the morning. Do they still have those, raves?
OK, all kidding aside, and these aren’t my drugs, a “friend” texted this photo to me (no really!), I had no idea how to properly dispose of unused prescription drugs, do you? Turns out there are websites and entire governments dedicated to such topics.
Proper Drug Disposal
- Don’t flush down the toilet. You numbskull. “Studies have found that up to 80% of streams in the U.S. have measurable concentrations of prescription drugs“.
- Most drugs should be mixed with coffee grounds or kitty litter and sealed in baggies to throw in your trash. Or, you can drop them off at participating locations (the latter being the better choice).
- Here in Sacramento you can check the Don’t Rush to Flush website to find a drop-off bin near you. But they won’t accept “controlled substances”. Those you have to give to law enforcement officers at DEA Take Back programs.
- October 26, 2013 is National Prescription Drug Take Back Day, according to the Department of Justice. This is where DEA law enforcement officials will be rolling large oxcarts through your neighborhood screaming “Bring out your drugs!”. Or maybe they’ll just provide drop-off locations where officials will take your drugs. And your fingerprints. And your picture. And your DNA. And if you’re really paranoid, your 4th amendments rights. So yeah, if you want to properly dispose of your 4th amendments rights, don’t forget to bring those too. In a Zip-Lock baggie mixed with kitty litter or coffee grounds.
So, that’s it. If you have any extra Vicodin laying around, and really, who would have any of THAT leftover, you have this one day to risk your criminal history being discovered and personally hand it over to a law enforcement official. Better to have your kid do it. While you wait in the car.
In a disguise.
With the engine running.
P.S. If you’re totally confused about the facts (and after reading this, I would be), check these sites for the real info:
Don’t Rush to Flush website (see the FAQ section)
How to Dispose of Unused Medicines (by the FDA)
How to Dispose of Medicines Properly (by the EPA)