This is a letter to all you email marketing “experts” out there whose clients include nanny services.
(Nannies. As in, babysitters. As in, NOT GOATS.)
Dear Mindless Idiot,
Not on this planet have you been following my blog “for a while”. Otherwise you would plainly see that Nanny Goats in Panties is actually NOT a good fit for your client, ABC Nanny Services, Inc., LLC.
In fact, you have spent less time reading my blog than the perverts who Google themselves here via “nannies in panties”; it only takes them about 3 seconds to realize they are in the wrong place.
I do not care that you have published an article on your own nanny services site, yet you do not hesitate to ask if I would be interested in publishing YOUR irrelevant advertisement posed as content on my site (and for nothing in return, I might add). NGIP fans are too intelligent for your silly little auto-bots, or whatever mechanism you’re erroneously using to tap this blog in your promotional endeavors. For all I know, I’m writing to a robot. You aren’t even human, are you.
You, sir or madam, have a lot of nerve acting as if giving me content of yours is somehow doing me a favor when the complete, total, and exact opposite is true. I’m offended that you think I’m that stupid. Especially when you’re the total dope in this case.
A quick primer, you moronic ape…
This is a nanny:
This is a nanny goat in panties:
I have a good mind to rat you out to your client and tell him that he’s wasting the pittance he’s paying for your direct email marketing campaign, except that I’m sure the nickel per email you get to clog up the super information highway is keeping the unemployment rate down.
I’m yelling at you here because it was bad enough you neglected to see if my blog was a good fit, but you manufactured claims of research.
Lied like a child who hands out a store-bought cookie and claims to have made it herself.
So you can take that cookie and stick it up your yeah.
Love and Kisses,