Do you know that when you try to take a picture of an amorous rhinoceros and he catches you, he will march right over with a contract and a pen and demand a share of the royalties you expect to make on the novelty T-Shirts depicting him and his partner with some caption about gay rhinos and Richter scales or whatever? No lie.
So anyway, I got one of those bad-ass cameras that looks like a point-and-shoot, but it also shoots videos in high definition. Here, let me show you:
Uh……..how does one exactly take a picture of one’s camera….?
Oh – I know!
You know, just a regular looking point-and-shoot camera that I throw in my purse and carry everywhere because life is like a box of chocolates.
But here’s one thing I don’t understand. This camera also does panoramic shots, where you hold down the button and sweep slowly from left to right like in that Taylor Swift commercial and it somehow makes one steady image, but what good are these types of pictures, I ask you? It’s more of a novelty, isn’t it? I mean it’s not like I can post them here on my blog. Look, I’ll show you. Here’s a picture of Times Square in New York I took last month.
And here’s a picture of San Francisco as seen from the tower elevator at the St. Francis hotel in Union Square.
The pictures are so freaking wide that you can’t show them effectively in a blog post. Granted, you can click on either picture to get an screen-sized enlarged view to see part of the awesomeness (and click on the enlarged picture to enlarge it further), but who’s going to do that? (By the way, you can right-click on a pic and select “Open Link in New Tab” to keep this page open, in case you didn’t already know. Not that you care, really, because you don’t want to take the time to have to click on something else, you just want me to say what I have to say so that you can get on with your life and I feel you, but let me finish, ‘kay?)
Also, my Kindle subscribers (of which I have a ridiculous number) can’t really see them although I think they can click on the picture and it will bring up an enlarged version, but it’s not the fastest thing and the Kindle is in black and white anyway – not that there’s anything wrong with that I mean I have a Kindle and I love it – so do they really want to waste their time, who knows?
But my question is, what’s the point of using the panoramic feature? Oh sure, I could print it out into a really big poster-sized monstrosity and hang it on the wall, only I can’t hang anything on my wall because I’m renting right now and that’s one of the rules.
I can’t have pets either.

















Pingback: I Left Fine Art In San Francisco | Nanny Goats in Panties