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How Do You Let Go of Your Children?

I cared for her. I fed her. I cleaned her little bottom. Okay, I paid people to clean her little bottom. But one heartbreaking day several weeks ago, I had to give her up for adoption. I’m talking, of course, about my baby, little Jade Mica. Here she is at Carmax, the adoption agency:

Notice the sparkle in her eye. That’s because she doesn’t know we’re leaving her there.

Some of you may have seen this very picture on my Facebook page. I was mourning my loss and had to tell someone. Someone who really really knew me and would understand. So I shared my feelings of loss with 500 of my closest friends.

I was inconsolable. Ask my husband. Little Jade Mica was a part of my life for nine years. But once I moved everything out of L.A. and into Sacramento, no longer living in two cities, there was no point in having two children any more.

Depression took me over, embraced me in its eternal grip, and handed me reams of Kleenex.

After about four or five weeks of this, my husband climbed up to my Tower of Despair and tentatively asked if we could stop fasting. At first I couldn’t believe his gall. How could he think of food at a time like this? But then my stomach growled and I too became famished. Come to think of it, I was starving!

Excitedly, we decided to try a new restaurant. Well, new to us, the restaurant has actually been around for nearly 100 years. After lunch, we walked into the warm sunshine rubbing our bellies feeling satisfied and content. My husband looked across the street and stopped short.

“What’s that?” he asked. “Is that little Jade Mica?”

My head jerked up to follow his pointing finger. We began to walk toward it’s sleeping form. As long as I had little Jade Mica, we had never seen another one in the same color. Could it be? It had to be…

It was! I pulled out my phone and took a picture:

My heart filled with joy. She looked healthy and happy. I was so glad to know she had already gone to a good home – you know how everyone only wants to adopt infants.

Carmax is about 20-25 miles from my house, in Roseville, which is not even in Sacramento. Sacramento is a pretty large city (don’t we have like over a million people or something?). When we saw it the other day after lunch, it was about 2-3 miles from our house. So maybe, if I wait long enough….

frilly panties 76x70

Coming Soon ellipses 24pt

OMG, OMG, OMG it’s almost here! There’s a new video game coming to town from on August 20. It’s called Coconut Queen and I’ll be credited as writer – woo hoo!

CQ header coming soon

And no, I didn’t write the code, you silly, I created characters and story and words and voices.

CQ Liz and Kane

You can check out the game’s website at , see some screen shots, watch a little video of the game, and download wallpaper and ringtones. And then you can sit and wait a few days with the rest of us! I’ll be the one in the corner looking like I’m doing the pee-pee dance.

cococo queen calendar

Graphics courtesy of

frilly panties 76x70

GTOTD 24pt

Did you know there’s a goat in Disneyland?

It’s amongst the 547,920 things you see in the It’s a Small World ride. Thanks to Mikki of the Here’s What Let’s Do blog for telling us about it.

TY ltrs 24 pt

I’d like to thank Collette at My Babcia’s Babushka for this little number, uh…whatever it is. A baseball holding open a book on a piano? I’m not sure exactly what it is, but I’m honored regardless.

I would also like to thank the Cincinnati Women Bloggers for teaching this HTML idiot how to stick one of these things on my blog for my many thousands of rabid fans who must have an NGIP badge of their own:

Nanny Goat in Panties

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  1. mrsmouthy says:

    I had to trade in my Honda when we got the SUV–the Honda I had scrimped and saved for on my teacher’s salary, and the very first car I had whose doors all locked without any MacGyver type devices–and the biggest insult was that the dealership gave me $2,000 for it.
    I’m hoping I get more for Vincenzo.

  2. You’re crazy funny! I skipped your post the other day because I dread seeing my daughter leave home, but decided I was in a better mood to read it today. OMG A car! I have laughed and laughed because I was anticipating good advice at how to “let go” of a child. You really are just crazy funny.

  3. Momo Fali says:

    I have had my car for almost 12 years, with no end in sight. When it is time to say goodbye, I will be so sad…and yet SO happy.

  4. I’m so glad she happy and healthy! You really raised her well.

  5. nipsy says:

    Hence the reason I keep pouring money into my slowly dying mini van..I had to give up my first baby when he caught fire in my driveway…short of the same thing happening again, I’ll drive this one forever..

  6. Was that a spoiler on your baby’s butt?

  7. JennyMac says:

    You wrote a video game? Bravo.
    And I have had a few cars I have truly loved. My convertible in grad school saw some really fun trips!

  8. Kathy says:

    We had very different car experiences. When I traded in my Ford Granada for a new car, I kicked the front wheel and told it to go to hell.
    Congrats on Coconut Queen! How freaking cool is that?!

  9. Sarah says:

    So glad you got to see Jade Mica one last time and know she’s well taken care of. πŸ™‚
    And HOW VERY COOL about the video game…Congratulations!
    A million people…I can’t imagine. My little town numbers in the “hundreds”. lol!

  10. Pam says:

    I can’t part with my babies either. I mourned my last one for several months before I was able to let it go.

  11. Margo says:

    I’m pleased for your happy ending- I’m not sure I will be so blessed. I hate my car right now… it’s a ten year old Honda odyssey – if I had to give her up, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t even mourn and tell her I love her until it’s too late. Her name is Wanda.

  12. I would hate to have to get rid of my Dylan (2000 Jaguar XJ-8 in baby blue) with the Nav system named Miss Kitty.
    I would feel the same way you did if I lost him.
    Love your video game — it looks fab, counting down the days with you!!
    The button is soooo cute… it is now on my sidebar!!
    I have seen that goat on the “It’s a Small World” ride at Disney World so many times because it’s still one of my fav rides at the park…

  13. Glamour Girl says:

    Wow! I know exactly how you feel about the car. I have a similar post about my Cecelia…

  14. I’m glad you loved Jade and found her a new home. I don’t love my car, Chrys, a big-ass mini-van with a bad attitude, and I’m trying to find it a new home, too. I hope it behaves better at the new place than it has at mine. And, who knows, maybe some day when Krys matures, he will meet someone like Jade, and they will bump trunks and have little motorcycles or golf carts or something.

  15. that is so cool! congratulations on your video game!

  16. That was a whammy of a post – highs and lows and a goat in Disneyland, oh my! Congrats on the Coconut Queen. It looks like a fun project to be a part of.

  17. Cheri Pryor says:

    OMG!! A freakin’ video game? It looks pretty cool, btw…if you are a video-game-type-person. Which I am not. But it still looks cool and fun.
    About Carmax…do you think they would take REAL children. I’m soooo ready to let mine go.

  18. Braja says:

    Jeez, for a moment when I saw the title I thought you meant GOAT BABIES….damn, woman, stop scarin’ me….

  19. Nooter says:

    sooo, this story youve written, can i expect there to be a dashing canine hero fashioned after someone you barely know from your blog, hmmmmmm?

  20. moooooog35 says:

    I get rid of my cars every 3 years, when the warranty is about to expire.
    I wish I could do that with my real kids.

  21. Margo says:

    Lolfr about the baby.
    Sorry you had to give her up πŸ™ But glad she went to a good home πŸ™‚

  22. Kristina P. says:

    I would cheat on all my cars, if I could.

  23. Jessica says:

    Hey: Way to go!!! They say we model our characters on people we know. Who is the guy? Is he single? On steroids?

  24. linlah says:

    Only one vehicle has affected me in a “oh I can’t let it go’ way and that was a motorcycle.
    and Lisa Anne – letting that Charger go would have killed me.

  25. Betts says:

    I thought I was the only that had emotional attachment to cars and felt like I was abandoning them when I left them behind for a newer one. I still look for me old cars and wonder if they’re okay and happy. Do think there’s a support group for us somewhere?

  26. Manic Mommy says:

    My “Jade Mica” was a 97 Honda Accord – “Bordeaux”. I see her siblings around everywhere. And point them out to my boys – like they care.
    I’m sorry for your loss.

  27. Lee says:

    Maybe I’m just a little hungry or something, but I want to know more about the restaurant. What’s the name & did you think the food was good?

  28. LPC says:

    Now if you can just get Jade Mica to text you it will be exactly like having an adult child.
    Props on the video game.

  29. Sparky says:

    This was a good article … disturbing … but good. [smile]
    I get weird with my motorcycles and now refuse to sell anymore, much to my husband’s chagrin.

  30. CatLadyLarew says:

    You are definitely the Coconut Queen! Congratulations! And I hope that Jade Mica comes back to visit frequently! (You know how it is… you think they’re all grown up, but they still keep coming back.)

  31. That post was packed!
    Awesome news all around, but especially on the game!

  32. erin says:

    Congrats on the video game! So cool!

  33. Mighty M says:

    Sounds like a fun game!! I am sure your baby will find a good home. πŸ™‚

  34. Pooba says:

    Holy crap no way! That’s crazy!

  35. mannequin says:

    Does the game have a goat in it? If there’s a monkey, there’s got to be a goat.
    What if little Mica Jade were by chance to move next door to you? Maybe you’d even have the chance to visit her, but no.
    Let her go Nanny Goat, let her go! You’ve moved on with your life after dumping her unsuspecting body so let her move on.

  36. Can I have your autograph?????
    A video game!!!!!How exciting for you. CONGRATULATIONS!!!
    And little Jade Mica– That’s too much… getting to see your baby all safe and shiny and loved. What are the odds of that happening?
    Now that you are a Video Game Queen will you get a Bentley?

  37. Roxane says:

    I was reading your post and the 20 month old I babysit started shouting “horsey- horsey!!!” then I realized that she was pointing at the Goats LOL… We had to have a lesson in farm animals AGAIN!

  38. Jan says:

    OMG – you wrote a video game??? My sons will build a shrine to you.
    You think I’m joking…

  39. Lisa Anne says:

    I felt the same way not to long ago. I had to trade in my 06 Dodge Charge with a HEMI. I commute 176 miles per day and it just didn’t make sense to drive a car that got 17mph. So I traded it in for a Honda Civic. That was a very very sad day. She was a beautiful red mean looking car. Now I have a small cute black civic that i love.
    in the end it was so worth it.
    So you live in Sacramento, your practically my neighbor. I’m in Antioch! lol

  40. Pricilla says:

    As a goat I don’t drive. The male person wants to get a cart and hook me up to it to pull the publicist around.
    CAN YOU IMAGINE SUCH AND INDIGNITY THRUST UPON ME?! I cannot and will refuse such if done. I am a goat not horsepower.
    The publicist cannot drive due to her health problems and double vision. It is not good to see two of everything coming at you. Or two lanes of road for that matter. She cried when she had to sell her stick shift Mustang with the 8 liter engine. It was teal green and she LOVED that car. It went fast…..

  41. I have never loved a car. I have wanted to love a car, but the relationship has never blossomed into love. I’ve had mad love for shoes, bags, clothing, Chocolate from Callie’s Candy Kitchen and other inanimates, but I can’t love a car. But I admire the love between you and Jade Mika. Maybe someday my minivan and I will get this crazy relationship right.

  42. Scott says:

    Wow, this is pretty good for you, Margaret! A full-on computer game! Are you getting Angelina Jolie to do the girl’s voice?

  43. Gladys says:

    This is why I presently have several vehicles. I just can’t let my babies go.
    HOWFREEKINCOOL are you? I’m pee in my panties excited for you.