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Succumbing to Drew Barrymore’s Boyfriend

So anyway, I got this pen for my birthday last week:

OK, it’s not a pen…it’s a friggin’ laptop!

I’m completely new to Mac, so there is a bit of a learning curve. Apparently, at some point I will become a religious zealot about it and refuse to understand how you ignorant PC users could POSSIBLY still be using your Draconian lead bricks. Luddites! (see? it’s already starting.)

During this transition, I will be nothing short of a confused child, victimized by a bitter divorce, trying to sympathize with each of my parents as they battle it out for the blue teeth and thumb drives.  I will be shuttled between Seattle and Silicon Valley on the weekends and 2 weeks in the summer.

And the lies! 

“You mother drained my bank account. She always had to have the most expensive version of everything!”

“When your father and I made love, his operating system would crash halfway through. Did he ever tell you THAT?”

As I put away my new laptop at the airport last weekend, the lady standing next to me in line uttered, “So it really is that thin.”

That’s what she said.

Let the record show, that was my first “That’s what she said” reference.

* * *

NGIP would like to thank Zen Mom for adding Nanny Goats In Panties to her her blog roll. A former reporter, Zen Mom is an excellent and thoughtful writer. If you’re a Joss Whedon fan you might enjoy her recent post entitled Strong Women Characters.

And another thing, MJ over at Note To Self is crazy. But crazy for a cause. She’s doing a blogathon starting at 9am EST tomorrow (Saturday), where she will post a new blog entry every 30 minutes for 24 hours. Can you imagine either blogging every 30 minutes OR staying awake for 24 hours? ACK! It’s madness! You can visit her blog and watch her all day tomorrow and give her some comment love. Any $donations$ go to benefit HUGS (Helping Uplift Grieving Survivors). She’s got all the info on her blog. Also, there’s a cool prize for the people who support her the bestest!

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  • http://offendedblogger.com Chelle B.

    Feel free to send that baby my way. I will figure it all out for you, and then I, too, can join the MAC cult! :)

  • http://muffin53.blogspot.com empress bee (of the high sea)

    i got the macbook air a few months ago. i call her doris (after doris day, you know, sleek, sexy, slim) and i have grown to LOVE HER!!! she is fast and smooth and she does whatever i tell her to do! i got a skin for the keyboard which i also love. and photoshop. and iworks. etc. etc. now i want an iphone 3g!!!
    enjoy yours, i know i do mine!
    smiles, bee
    xoxoxoxooxoxxoxoxo

  • http://muffin53.blogspot.com empress bee (of the high sea)

    oh, me again, sorry. did you get the wireless bluetooth mouse? if it jumps around a bit turn it off and back on. that is the only problem i have.
    and did you know there is now a bluetooth camera card? it knows when you are nearby with your new girl and asks if you want to download your photos WIRELESS!!!! woo hoo.
    gotta love this stuff!

  • http://humorium.blogspot.com don

    Should be handy for jimmying doors if you forget your keys too.

  • http://www.lovetheeclecticlife.blogspot.com Your Pal Pinki

    When we first saw the commercial for it, being pulled out of a manilla envelope, we had to stop and let our jaws gape. I rushed out to the Apple store just to check it out. Unbelievable how thin. And light. WOW!

  • http://honeywine.wordpress.com honeywine

    Thin and shiny…it’s like looking at Paris Hilton.

  • http://www.thebiggertheyget.com Tina

    Hey, I’m a Luddite? My laptop is Draconian?
    Oh. Right. I am. It is. Damn.
    Love your blog! Added you to my blogroll today.

  • http://www.janssushibar.com Jan

    Ah, the iMac people.
    Well, you know what they say – once you go Mac, and so on.
    I’m far too dependent on my laptop to move to an entirely different platform. The cost alone of replacing my software would send me to the poorhouse. I also have some highly specialized, proprietary software that simply will not run on a Mac.
    It looks cool, though. You’ll have to let us know how you like it.

  • http://witsbitch.blogspot.com chatblanc

    I have a severe case of Mac envy right now! I’m still stuck with my dumb as a door-stop PC. *sniff* I’m certain your new love will convince you–”once you go Mac, you never go back!” :)

  • http://sinisterdan.wordpress.com SinisterDan

    Crash halfway through – ha!
    I’m running a poll over at my joint – voters are welcome.
    Free walnuts!

  • http://drowseymonkey.blogspot.com DrowseyMonkey

    That is one teeney weeney laptop. I mean you’d have to have a really small lap to operate it.

  • http://scratchbags.wordpress.com/ Scratch Bags

    This is such a sexy laptop.:) My big Dell is feeling ashamed of its size now. :-P Belated Happy Birthday btw.

  • http://scratchbags.wordpress.com/ Scratch Bags

    The subscription thing is working fine now. Have added you, and now I will not miss any of your posts. Yay!!:)

  • http://www.psoriginal.blogspot.com Peggy

    I’m pretty sure mine won’t fit in a manilla envelope but neither will my computer…..

  • http://stephbrownthinks.blogspot.com steph

    I’d be scared it would break if I was too rough or something (thats what she said)… I think I’ll just have to admire other people’s:)

  • http://www.colbymarshall.blogspot.com colbymarshall

    That’s amazing! And I REALLY did think it was a pen!

  • http://loscuatroojos.com TheFourEyes

    Another recruit against the evil empire!
    Welcome!
    I’ll have your cup of kool-aid sent right over.
    TheFourEyes

  • http://margeauxj.blogspot.com MJ

    Congrats on the new laptop! I’ve been thinking about a Mac. But as sexy as that thing is, I just can’t live without my disk drive…
    Thanks for the link love!

  • http://www.winingandironing.wordpress.com wendz

    oh my … I feel that my computer is as archaic as I am ….
    good luck – hope you can figure it all out!

  • http://nocleaninghere.blogspot.com Stephanie

    I’m experiencing a little envy too – downloading pictures wireless?? No back pain hauling it around? LUCKY!

  • http://extremelyfunny.info/ Jinksy

    I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Drew and the dude from the Mac commercials split up.

  • http://dennisthevizsla.wordpress.com Dennis the Vizsla

    It took my wife about five minutes to turn into a Mac zealot after she got her iBook. (Of course, I’m even worse — I run Linux.) Enjoy the light, skinny, spyware-free Air!

  • http://web.mac.com/ekane628 Erin

    Mac and the boyfriend, both lovely!

  • http://www.janssushibar.com Jan

    Dennis the Vizsla, the next time I get a new laptop, this one will become a Linux machine. I’d use Linux – which OS would you recommend, btw? – on the new one, but I don’t want to plunge head-first into Emulator Hell.

  • http://www.merlotmom.blogspot.com merlotmom

    ooh, i want one. i wanted to buy everything in the apple store when i was getting the new iphone. i love that place. welcome to the club. happy bday, btw, sorry i missed it.

  • http://crotchety-old-man-yells-at-cars.blogspot.com/ Joe

    I could never have a computer that small and light. It takes a lot of restraint for me to not fling mine across the room when I get annoyed. That one is just too flingable. (is that a word–it should be)
    Best of luck with it.

  • http://alimartell.com ali

    drew barrymore’s boyfriend is no longer her boyfriend.
    he’s single. awesome.
    i COVET that laptop. for serious.

  • http://ridingwithricky.blogspot.com/ Rickey Henderson

    Rickey welcomes you to the technological equivalent of Scientology! Ever the rugged individualist, Rickey’s a proud Apple freak as well…

  • http://www.shoutdaily.com Tricia

    Are you sure that’s not a pen, cause it really, really looks too small to be a computer. That bitter divorce has scarred you for life, for life I tell you.
    Now, I’m going to check out MJ cause I’m thinking this sounds suspect. There’s got to be an-already stored cache of posts…who the heck can think that much in 24 hours? Is she really your sister and she was also whacked by that messy divorce?

  • http://www.nannygoatsinpanties.com Margaret

    Tricia: I don’t know if she has stockpiled blogs or not, but she’s probably going to be up for the 24 hours, cause she’s answering all the comments she gets and we’ll be able to tell then if she doesn’t keep answering them all night long. Hey I know, why don’t YOU check on her at 3 or 4 am and let ME know how it went. (hee hee!)

  • http://www.peglegstarfish.com Julie in Houston

    Wow, that is super thin! I love it and I bet you will too. And thanks for making me totally hate me fat ass laptop! But I don’t know if I have enough brain power to learn how to use a Mac. It just might be too easy for me complicated brain. :) Have fun with it.
    http://www.peglegstarfish.com

  • http://bigshoes.today.com violetteb

    You make me laugh…really that thin, LOL

  • http://www.spillitnow.blogspot.com Erika

    I joined the Mac world a few months ago… though I tok an illustrator class, it was still challenging at first… but well worth learning! I love it so much better than my non-mac!! have you used photo booth yet? It’s the best, keeps me pretty entertained lol.

  • http://notaday.blogspot.com Tracie

    A female friend of mine has one of these. She travels frequently and says that it’s a veritable guy-magnet when she’s in the airport and working while while waiting in the airport in between flights.